What the fudge is a Hatchimal!?

hatchimals

So, my daughter is an avid watcher of those Youtube videos where they unbox things and unwrap eggs and open toys. This morning she told me she wanted a Hatchimal. Okay, let’s check this out, I thought. I already have no idea what to get a child who plays with absolutely no toys that are made for her actual age level, so I’m open to anything at this point when it comes to Christmas gifts. I pull up Amazon, do a quick search, and this is what I find: Hatchimals Interactive Creature Penguala Hatching Egg. First of all, what the bleep is a “Penguala”? Is this like a penguin and a koala? My child still thinks those dust particles that show in sunlight are butterflies, I don’t need to add a Penguala to the mix. I noticed that it said “only available through third party sellers” and decided to check out other sites, like Target. Seemingly you can get these things there for ONLY $59.99. What a steal! Not. I suppose if you absolutely must buy your child one of these things (I get it, you snapped on the 587th time of being asked, I would too) you should probably check out your local Target or Walmart first. I for one will not be purchasing one of these things. Apparently you can teach it to walk, talk, dance, and more! I already have a toddler thank you, I know what it’s like.  I’m always blown away by the new toys of the year that cost and arm, a leg, and the parent’s sanity. I mean, a talking penguin that comes out of an egg. That is what we are spending the equivalent of a pair of shoes or a makeup palette or half a grocery trip on! It doesn’t teach my kid how to tie her shoes or give her candy so she’s gonna be interested in it for about three days before it gets shoved under the bed in favor of a box or a piece of lint. I told her that Hatchimals were only sold in Antarctica so unfortunately I was unable to obtain one. I wish you a happy holiday shopping season, may your child never hear of these things.

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